Live von der Corona-Quarantäne-Station:
bro come quick. david just played some kind of secret chord and the Lord is pleased af
— zach silberberg (@zachsilberberg)
Mar 1, 2022
When I was a kid, if a movie character had a cellphone it meant they were a workaholic who hated Christmas.
— Daniel Kibblesmith (@kibblesmith)
Mar 2, 2022
waiting for godot is so funny. like girl!! he’s not coming
— alex (@_unwell)
Mar 10, 2022
if we all stay in bed, what are they gonna do? pull us out? while we’re still in our jim jams? i don’t think so
— sey smythe (@seynique)
Mar 10, 2022
hey sorry i acted weird the other day i was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired
— trash jones (@jzux)
Mar 16, 2022
Your email did indeed find me well, but it left me a shell of the man I used to be.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman)
Mar 18, 2022
i literally pay so much respect to parents because like… imagine getting home from a long day at work and… there’s a kid… in your home …….
— em (@uhhmmily)
Mar 21, 2022
apple stores sind die schlimmstmögliche mischung aus technikmuseum und bürgeramt
— Ilona Hartmann (@zirkuspony)
Mar 23, 2022
Vampires have it exactly right: find the sleeping schedule that works for you, avoid excessive sun exposure, and only show up at someone’s house if explicitly invited.
— The Wordsmith Wraith (@wordsmithwraith)
Mar 23, 2022
when i was 15 my mother’s jewelry was stolen. the cops were really into the angle that i had sold the jewelry for drugs to throw a party. my mother looked at me wistfully and said no, she couldn’t throw a party to save her life. she hasn’t even figured out her hair.
— passover hate account (@tashakaminsky)
Mar 23, 2022
“i was born in the wrong generation” bro we can literally fry shit with the air. what else do u want
— nyeloq (@bluefaceniloc)
Mar 24, 2022
warum studiert man Architektur junge es gibt genug Häuser
— E L H O T Z O (@elhotzo)
Mar 31, 2022